i woke up this morning, june 29 1999, with a hard-on and automatically rubbed off. again. then i got to thinking of how the doc in nashville had recommended a hard-on inhibiting drug or shot or something. i was kind of in fear of it then, but now i think that would be such a great thing. you're supposed to use it every month, as it only lasts for about a month.

i can't say that sex never meant that much to me, because years ago it meant a lot. now, being that i'm not actively and relentlessly searching for friends, a purpose, even justification, it means diddley. so meaningless, in fact, that it's not a favorite pasttime but just something i favored in the past's time. and if i got the "penile limpifier," i'd only be missing out on rubbing off. and that would keep my shorts free from stains.

i don't know how much it costs, i don't really know anything about it, i don't even know if it's worth it now that i am really thinking about it. it doesn't take me long to rub off every morning, the only thing it'd be doing is saving me time. no, i don't think i'll look into it, not now at least. maybe if i ever do anything with my life besides sitting in front of my memoirs on a computer screen, i'll do it. maybe if i ever get involved with people i'll do it. as for now, i'll keep waking up with hard-ons. back

check out my site, www.jaggedlittledyl.com , unless you're there now