sometimes i want a will to become "normal," to enjoy all the benefits of "normalcy," such as friends, an intention or a reason to get up in the morning, a reason to undress and/or take my sneakers off before going to bed, a reason to take a shower every morning, a reason to be "cool" with the joneses, a reason to do without thought because the same routine is done every day...i guess you know what i'm saying. well, then i say to myself...
having friends would be nice, but it's hard for me to care about anybody but myself. being focused on one intention stifles creativity. i feel cozier sleeping in my clothes...as for my sneakers, well sometimes i'm too tired to take em off. sometimes it's just not convenient to be clean for the day. most of the time, "the joneses" are robotic. as for routines, well, i've never wanted something rational.
and sure, people who aren't behind the wheel and role playing along with the lyrics on the radio may be at peace with themselves, but schizophrenia can be eye opening.