for years after high school, i was constantly unhappy and lonely because i had no friends. everytime somebody was nice to me, i took it as they wanted to be my friend...or have sex with me - maybe i was a loner because i did not know how to make friends i didn't suck off.

anyway, i was an unhappy loner for five years after the accident, driving in my jimmy everywhere miles away to occupy my time. i bought it in 1994 with 50,000 miles on it and in 1997 it had about 200,000. that's how bored and lonely i was. i even picked up a few hitchhikers to get some close human relations!

i was always envious of young groups of friends, young men together, i felt i was being left out. and i was mad nobody was calling me in. i didn't know who to be mad at, so eventually i got over it (if you can call it that) and built myself up in my mind as being "too legit" for youth. i mean, really, i kind of feel i was, seeing youth gallavant themselves around in tommy clothes, hearing "cool" be their linguistic panacea, just seeing so much blind naivete in their states of being kind of repulses me.



check out my site, www.jaggedlittledyl.com , unless you're there now