yeah, i'm all screwed up, i rubbed off two days in a row. i've no excuse, i am a hypocrite, blah blah. when i am left to my own devices, i've said, when i have no purpose and when i dwell in my own purposelessness then i tend to masturbate. i know i have bashed those who masturbate as a way of life, i know that doing so would make me a hypocrite in your mind, but i have nothing to hide. i'm just wondering, how many times a day would you masturbate if you were at home all day with only your mind and your cutesy-wootsy dog to keep you company? okay, i live with my friend, but he was actually either sleeping or out for most of the days that i resorted to masturbating.

i actually have masturbated so much from age 8 until age 26, that i think my balls have shrunk.

anyway, i guess the moral of this story masturbate is to dwell in your own purposelessness. well, aside from your own sexual insecurities/inadequacies, but that is more a pre-part 2 topic. so i'll just elaborate on the purposelessness aspect. what's the fantasy that stimulates masturbation, besides a daydream? when does a daydream happen, i don't daydream unless i don't have anything worth paying attention to. that is why i went a month without masturbating, my mind was always occupied with something, be that web design or even something as commonplace as spending time with my friend. i didn't have enough time to masturbate, i was too interested in my life and where it was taking me. i was satisfied with my life and i could not want for more. so what does that say about people who have time to masturbate?

well, that is my revalation. revelation? i don't feel like checking :)

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