"im the type of guy nobody would ever peg as being into guys, ever!"
(taken from an aol fag's profile)
i was speaking with an intellectual on gender-identity, and his was a different definition than mine is. i dared not to question him, but i'm right and he is wrong.
my definition of gender-identity is: the gender one identifies with.
i·den·ti·fy to consider as identical or united; equate. (taken from dictionary.com)
therefore, gender-identity means: the gender one considers oneself identical with.
think about this. and ask yourself the following question:
why do gay "men" have so many women as heroes, if a "hero" is an idol, an object of extreme admiration and devotion? take a look at their tastes in music (i remember worshipping madonna - it started well before she publicly worshipped other "women"). go through my old lps - cher, scandal (a band whose lead vocals were sung by a woman), dolly parton, debbie gibson, whitney houston, i could go on, but i idolized women! madonna, especially. i put them on pedestals because i was most comfortable with them...i didn't dare say that i considered myself one with their gender.
it's true: gay "men" lack masculine gender-identity. the proof is in their actions. take a look at jack from will & grace, for "he" is a prime example of not having acquired masculine gender-identity. not all "men" hold their lack of gender-identity out as a spectacle for all the world to see, as jack does, that is why the buzzwords for self-description in the gay community are words like "straight-acting," etc.
also, think about your friends as a child. mine were mostly girls, mine were my sister's friends, mine were not the supermen i aspired to be like and to be friends with - simply because i did not feel comfortable with those types. i felt comfortable with girls...because, in my mind and heart, i was "just one of the girls". and, if i went through my twenties thinking and feeling that way about myself, i'd now be a woman. that's the problem cross-dressers share with those who have gotten a sex change operation - gender-confusion.