it's true that the spare tire they were carrying was badly in need of some air.

oh, sorry...

it's true that the mad desire i am carrying is manly, i need me some males.

it's true also that i have a homosexual attraction.  and i fantasize about acting it out.  but actually doing it, that's a different story.  this one time, at band camp...

oh, sorry...

this one time, at a bath house, i was so honored to have a 23 to 25 year-old sit next to me and start talking to me.  we got a bed and i was so excited to finally be experiencing what i missed out on as a young adult.  and i tongued his ass (see my "christmas wrapping" parody) just like i wanted and "just like gays hype as a sexy psyche".

"but his poo scent made me doubt it"

i hate to bug you in the middle of dinner, but it was a slap in the face, the voided way i embraced.  months later i got the nerve to meet someone again and, trying a different gay fetish on for size, i kissed and licked his foot.  i can't hold my breath for too long, so i took one.  how gamy (i learned that word from a friend named tim in like 6th grade).  on top of that, they were rough in some places and not pleasing to touch.

it's true also that i've lusted after the above marine since i first got a glimpse of his manly armpits in 1997 or so.  hairy armpits i've cherished ever since those 6 years when i looked around in the locker room at school and thought, "why don't i have any of that".

it's true also that i fantasize of sniffing such strong hairy armpits.  i sniff my own all the time.  but, as i sniff my feet and balls, i am unsure if i would get anything but a sense of repulsed closure from this kind of intimacy with anyone else but me.  i have never buried my face into anyone's armpits, i'm not avoiding it to keep the fantasy alive, it's just when i have the chance...it's too real.

i think i need me some of digital underground's sex packets when i don't wanna jack it.  this human thing is not all it's cracked up to be.

check out my site, www.jaggedlittledyl.com , unless you're there now