when this song was popular, the summer of 89, i remember my sister singing, "i'm gonna get dressed for safe sex"
in the words of milli vanilli, "okay, laurel, this one's for you"

tried to straight it, kids i was given
tried to gay it, blisters stick on my bone
piss me off, i hate my seeing so much the town through myself's own 'stosterone

how you gonna help your blunder? oh oh oh
whatcha gonna tell your doctor? i don't know
how you gonna quell your mother? i'll leave home

i oughtta get dressed for safe sex, making me numb through a plastic baggy
get dressed for safe sex, making me numb for my lust

i've got to lay, i'm trembling now, sir
i'll feed your rump and blow my lust up inside
it don't take long, semen comes faster, i cum the way the straight boy jim did in Pie

now you justify a rubber oh oh oh
fuck your lover so much longer, i guess so
are you gonna steal your brother's? i don't know

i'm gonna get dressed for safe sex, hitting the top takes a bit much longer
get dressed for safe sex, making me numb for more humps!

look sharp!


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