i got back from the grocery store, where i bought needful things (that was a book by stephen king, a while back) and a cucumber.  i went into the restroom and put a little of my shampoo on the cucumber, on the tapered end which was the reason i bought it.

i realize i said to god that i would never do it again, after the last time when i leaked from my butt for almost a week, but i just had to.   i got it up there, about four inches - i used my fingernail to mark the spot where the cucumber met my anus - probably about four inches.  i put my thumb and forefinger around it, and they could not touch - that's how thick i was spread.

i got home and was telling myself, "i keep doing this stuff," and the song "deeper and deeper" came to mind.  this came from the erotica album - the sex book - i bought the book and the cd, and after a few months i just threw them out.  that's when i stopped following madonna, she is just too anti-christ for me.

i can't help mauling my butt
i go deeper and deeper, affirming my hole
christians said no heaven, but shucks,
i'm no queer humping wieners or burly men, no

when your hole can host wide things,
you can fit most anything - go stuff your wallet and keys
mount a phallic flag-type pole,
then you can stuff your soap-on-rope and get so washed so thoroughly

tragic, you would see my world
(son, wanna get your clit so laid, i wanna eat it)
when i've gotta spray, my squirt's jerked off
(you've gotta see self-love of queens, my young depressed dude)

but i - i can't help mauling my butt
i go deeper and deeper, affirming my hole
christians said no heaven, but shucks,
i'm no queer humping wieners or burly men, no

i'm freaking my hole
horny males would love my sex to fill their scars of male ident'
that's what my life has shown me
all the little big type bruises end up needing fucked or screwed
i'd let my father bone me

tragic, you would see my world
(son, gotta 'cept your dick today, it wants a queer male)
i don't wanna lay or jerk mine off
(why, are you needing other things 'side from the sex-goo?)

my life, i can't help mauling my butt
i go deeper and deeper, affirming my hole
christians said no heaven, but shucks,
i'm no queer humping wieners or burly men, no

lovers said that romance is sex
and i believe that no friends is just getting me
fucked by brawny old things and by tawdry homies
and dudes try to hold me, and you'd find me in their beds
i need to be liked, the man's the thang, so i'm fucked by the guys
and they never wanna see me again!
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