to anyone who also cares about the sanctity of homosexuality:

  i celebrate my gay desires and regard them as WHO I AM, but the majority of the gay community doesn't seem to believe in diversity and they seem to envision my gay desires as the mark of a cookie-cutter "gay gene" that is void of the cognitive emotions that overwhelm me when i am confronted by masculinity.  there is plenty of justification for my gay desires, and though society's acceptance of the "gay gene" allows gay people to be regarded as "preprogrammed" and therefore a little more safe from schoolyard taunts and the like, the "gay gene" robs me of my homosexual identity by telling me that there is no justifiable reason for liking the things that i like.

  i feel victimized and bashed by other members of the gay community, especially by my teacher.  so victimized, that i wrote her a letter, a letter that i am showing to you so that i can relate to you the destruction of the psyche of the "gay male" that she is unwittingly promoting with her celebration of the "gay gene".  in hopes, i guess, that it stops.  here follows the letter:

by telling me i was born gay, you are compromising my gay desires.   by telling me i was born gay, you are denying me of every little (or GIGANTIC) eccentricity that i have come to love of the masculine gender.  by telling me i was born gay, you are saying that there's nothing special about the gender i am attracted to - that i'm just playing by the rules and that there's no part of ME that's behind my homosexual desires.

  i am attracted to men, i am attracted to masculinity, i have been ever since my youth - ever since the rejection of my peers in gym class and being picked last for teams.  ever since after gym class, in the locker room, looking around at the hairy armpits of my peers and wondering why mine were hairless.  ever since it was ingrained in my brain that i was not "man enough," i have been attracted to men.  people even often mistook me for a girl (my mom never cut my hair short enough to get me looking like the other boys).

this had put me through much pain and torment, but i've grown to be able to take pride in my past - it has made me the "gay male" that i am today.  and your telling me that i was born gay, just slaps that past in the face - it slaps ME in the face, it slaps the man-lusting "gay male" that i am - RIGHT IN THE FACE.

how dare you belittle your students this way?  are you too stupid to take an honest look at yourself and make sense of your own sexual desires?  then get out of the teaching profession, you're a master at nothing - you are a "young apprentice," and i will not be "wrapped around your finger" anymore.  i am withdrawing from all your classes.

incidentally, it is because of PEOPLE LIKE YOU, that i started my anti-gay blog in 1999 - and it is because of PEOPLE LIKE YOU, that has morphed into the 300 megabyte multimedia CONSERVATIVE oasis that is the homepage i point prospective "hookups" to.  yes, "hookups," i think i've even seen you on the gay dating sites.  out to poison more young minds?

  you have taught me well, o captain my captain, but you are not a good teacher.  most students will just digest all your crapola-propaganda without thinking twice.

dylan terreri, i

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