i have not stuck anything up my ass for a while - today in the shower i didn't need to loosen it up with anything before the giant dildo. it took a little while to get that up there, i only soaped the dildo and not my ass. then i soaped my ass, it went up fine...and i left it up there a bit. then i stuck the edge shaving gel can up there for a bit.

this started as "look at my loose behind," since the first "turn back time" parody i did was "look at my firm behind". (which i actually got from mtv, when the song was popular they had some kind of a parody of cher singing that)

it's my pervert behind - it's not that tight, no way
i could house those gerbils that hurt you, your boo-tay

my hole's so wide, i live for fisting it - my hole's so wide, i can stuff things up it
my wife's vagi...na can't fuck things like mine - working construction, those tools are fine
i didn't even mean to turn you...on, didn't want your weiner, oh
i won't be laid by guys, no anal

it's my pervert behind - it's not that tight, no way
i could house those gerbils that hurt you, your boo-tay
with my fake penis-large, i'll fill my large dude-womb
when l fuck three hunks, three guys as huge as coons
i won't feel hurt or cry

my world was shattered, that's what formed my heart
one summer shook-up high school, social things fell apart
i walked out of all the dorms and i quit the class
cuz i lost every dream college ever sent
too taunted, high-school-friends would mock me
too down to ever just move on, i'm so much left behind - no college

it's my pervert behind - it might just compensate
my lame past of hurt gets no earned hu...man-relates
if i could relive all, i'd live to talk to dudes
then i'd hump the hunks, but i am screwing tools
oh, if i could turn back time
if i could turn back time
iif i could, i would diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie from aids, see?

i didn't even mean to turn you...on, didn't want your weiner, oh
i won't be laid by guys, no no!

it's my pervert behind - it's not that tight, no way
i could house those gerbils that hurt you,
if i could relive all, i'd live to talk to dudes
then i'd hump the hunks, but i am screwing tools

if i could turn back time, if i could i'd have aids
and aids would make me eighteen in a grave
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