this is another letter of complaint from my website of (homo)sexual assault that is
"When I'm hungry, I eat. When I'm thirsty, I drink. When I feel like saying something, I say it." - Madonna
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dear sir or vagina:

to human resources and administrators:

hello, i am writing as a perspective gay student (with a penchant for cross-dressing) who has questions about your school's harassment policies. my questions need to be answered before i even start to narrow my selection of colleges down, for i do not want to find myself transferring out of a school due to a possible oversight in the diversity department. i refuse to be bullied with sexual harassment. let me be clear: I REFUSE TO BE BULLIED WITH ANYTHING THAT CAN BE REGARDED AS SEXUAL HARASSMENT.

i would like to start by asking if your school refers to females as "women" while referring to males as "guys". this would provide an uncomfortable learning environment for me, being that anyone's use of the word "guys" to refer to men is as nonchalant (and disrespectful) as referring to females as "broads" is. in addition - referring to men as "guys" shows a lack of respect towards the members of the gender which obviously is the gender that has more going for it, given the size of weights at "fitness for women" establishments...and given that the average female is shorter than the average man (who, in turn, has been built wider than the average female ever since the female's hips widened to allow the passage of a baby). i'm sorry if bringing up men's broad shoulders appears as a slight to women's broad hips, i am trying not to insinuate that there is a lesser gender (or one specific gender that was so obviously designed for motherhood) i do not know the emotional state of whoever would be reading this letter at the school...but it all is a part of the many concerns that i have about selecting a college.

my concern of suffering from sexual harassment may be unheard of, it may seem outrageous to the college, but i will maintain that i would be more outrageous to request that the school scrap its gender-based athletic program in the name of "a woman can do anything a man can do" feminism. i would be more outrageous to request that the school stop basing physical competitions on gender (as if to suggest that there is one specific gender that would serve as a "handicap" in light of the other specific gender).

i realize that many schools harass men with their "affirmative action" programs, which, like the military, allow for gender to trump ability with regards to admissions. this brings me to my next question: would your college forfeit a brilliant man's mind for the sake of political-correctness (and maybe even for the self-esteem of a less-qualified wombn)?

i realize that "strong woman" is the new politically-correct (and oxymoronic) buzzword, but i must ask if your school harasses men by referring to wombn (who can't budge 100 pounds) as "strong". this would also be an insult to men - especially to men who've spent too much time lifting weights in an effort to be regarded as "strong," when from day one they were as strong as 90% of the "strong woman" who are alive today. yes, i speak from experience on this point.

as a boy, i have been taunted to no end. i have been called a "grit" by my sister (her words: "a combination between a GIRL and an IT"). i have been outcasted from the boys in gym class by being picked last for teams. i was a skinny boy, no matter how much i would eat to gain weight, and i can remember taylor robinson calling me a "skinny little queer" in science class. i have been harassed to no end, and i will not have it in college. i WILL NOT be harassed for being a member of the gender that is so obviously MORE i will not apply to a college that is prone to deny me because my gender is the gender that excels more (ie, the reason for gender-based sports teams, gender-based military requirements, gender-based poker nights at the casino, the "do it herself" *special ed.* workshop at homo depot, and fitness centers catering to those who require lighter barbells). i refuse to hear or read anything meant to denigrate my gender, especially in light of a bunch of egg-bleeding vaginas and babymilk-spurting MOMmary glands whose sense of gender-equality should have been slapped in the face by the very implementation of the aforementioned gender-based activities.

as i said, i REFUSE to hear or read ANYTHING that can be regarded as sexual harassment directed at me while i am pursuing a college education, and i am hoping someone would be able to answer my questions about the climate at your school.

mr. dylan terreri, i
dr. sheldon cooper, ii
"When I'm hungry, I eat. When I'm thirsty, I drink. When I feel like saying something, I say it." - Madonna
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